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Thanks, but no thanks! - Job's "Comforters"

Have you ever received "help" from a well-meaning individual that wasn't helpful at all?  It may have been in the form of advice.  It may have been a verse on a card or a visit to your home.

People have many reasons for reaching out to help.  I like to hope that motivations are pure and that there truly is a desire to aid in the problem at hand.  However, we know that is not always the case.  People sometimes reach out because of guilt or a sense of obligation.  People reach out to feel good about themselves.  People reach out to gain favor.  People reach out to fulfill a need within their own lives.  Unfortunately, no matter why people reach out, they sometimes do it wrong.
  
Job's friends got it wrong. In Job 42, the Lord rebukes Job's friends.  How did they get to the point of rebuke from the Almighty? Things had started out great; they had shown up.  Then, however, they opened their mouths.  What came out was hurtful, arrogant, and insult upon injury.  They had a perfect opportunity to minister to Job in an especially painful time of his life, but they failed.

I want to address the two sides of this coin as they apply to you -- as a receiver and as a giver.

When you become the recipient of unhelpful help, how do you respond?  Do you receive it graciously?  Do you point out all the flaws?  Do you tell others about the hurt and spread malice?  Do you learn from the situation?  Humans are humans.  Let's remember that the help we receive will not be perfect.  It may even be hurtful.  I want to encourage you to speak the truth in love you have the opportunity, but be gracious receivers regardless.

When you have the opportunity to help, please do so armed with the best knowledge you can obtain.  Talk to others who have walked through a similar situation and learn how to best minister to your hurting friend.   When you write a card, avoid trite phrases and feel-good verses taken out of context.  If you want to drop something by, find out the best time or just leave it on the doorstep and send a text saying that you left it.

Don't let this post discourage you from helping; rather let it encourage you to check your motives and help in the best way you can!

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